Last night I had a dream, I dreamt that my deceased father came back to life. The reason was that his original body was tormented by cancer and could not be repaired, then he revived using his own doppelgänger. Under the wooden door's threshold, my father's doppelgänger began to have warmth, then his fingers could move slightly, he opened his eyes, and I handed him a glass of water to drink, just like when he was critically ill in the ICU, when the doctor said he couldn't drink water, I still brought a cup for him to drink. Everything felt so real, but after waking up, I realized it was just a dream.
When I was young, the conditions at home were not good, I started herding cattle at the age of 5, but my father's heartfelt wish was for my siblings and me to go to school together and attend university. This was my father's requirement for us. As a result, my siblings and I managed to get into college, rolling and crawling our way through. I feel that studying requires a bit of talent; I find mathematics easy to learn, while my younger sister is self-taught in language arts.
When I was in school, I was very frugal, dreaming every day about how to make money after graduating from university, to earn big money. I think many children from poor families have this wish. During university, I spent almost no other money; I allocated 10 yuan per day for two meals, which totals 300 yuan a month. This was already a heavy burden for a family from the countryside, and my parents had it tough. Because my family was poor, I was introverted and a bit insecure, like most children from poor families. Now, stepping into society, my personality has become much brighter.
The three siblings can all attend university, mainly because of our father. He loved drinking and smoking, and by the time he discovered he had cancer, it was already in the late stages. After a year of chemotherapy, he passed away. His health had always been good, but unfortunately, the blade of fate was too ruthless and struck him down.
In the past, I saw him completely drunk, and I disliked it very much in my heart. At that time, I thought I must not get drunk like him. But now, I occasionally get so drunk that I'm out of it. My partner, seeing me like this, probably feels the same disgust I felt watching my father back then. It's better not to get drunk when drinking in the future. Otherwise, I might enjoy drinking, but I would also not know what happened, and blacking out is indeed not good; it's dangerous. I still know my alcohol tolerance, which is half a kilogram of baijiu; exceeding that is not good.
I think being able to raise three university students is probably the most successful thing my father did in his life. I now also have three children and am a father to three kids. If they can all graduate with a bachelor's degree, I would consider it a success. Whether they pursue further studies is their own decision. When my father was alive, my first child was a daughter, and he particularly hoped for a grandson. However, he never said it out loud, silently wishing for it, but there was still a certain pressure on me as his only son. I thought to myself that when my children grow up, I wouldn't push them to get married or force my son to have a grandson; they should decide for themselves.
However, if a person chooses not to marry or have children in their lifetime, I believe they will surely regret it when they are old, especially when they see those around them surrounded by children and grandchildren, while they are all alone. Although there is personal freedom, it will be very lonely when the time comes, and at that moment, they will definitely regret it. At this time, I think of my father, who was truly great. He actively underwent chemotherapy, and before he passed away, he saw my wife give birth to twins, a little over a month later, he passed away peacefully. If he had insisted on undergoing surgery in the ICU, he probably could have held on a bit longer. Of course, the final process was painful, and at that time, he chose to go home. I also respected his choice; this way, he suffered less and avoided excessive medical treatment.