🍽 $TRUMP: Steak, Patriotism & -87% Unrealized Losses
Last night, Trump hosted a “relaxing dinner” for the top holders of his memecoin.
Average loss per guest? Roughly $8 million.
But spirits were high — or at least artificially inflated.
The menu included:
• Steak
• Merch
• Patriotism
• Unrealistic Hope
• And a generous serving of Promises™
Quote of the night:
“Crypto is our future. America is great again.
And you guys… you’ll be in profit soon.
#Allegedly.”
They nodded.
Some from belief.
Most from dehydration — after an 87% drawdown.
But every fairy tale ends at sunrise.
This morning:
• Trump announced a 50% tariff on the EU starting June 1
• And a 25% penalty on Apple if iPhones aren’t made in the USA
Markets screamed.
Investors Googled: “Can I hedge PTSD with options?”
Lesson of the day:
Trump can soothe a crypto investor — but only until breakfast.
Then it’s protectionism, chaos, and fresh red candles.
He walks the tightrope between Crypto Messiah and Trade War Warlord.
And markets? Still the unwilling hostages.
